When Birds Prefer The New Bird To Their Humans…

Q:  " I have a seven year old male cockatiel, Cubby, that I have always had a close bond with. We were best friends until six months ago when I got another cockatiel (male) to keep him company.  Now he wants is to spend all of his time with his new best friend, and he doesn’t seem to like me any more."

Mallory, H., New London, CT

A:  I had a similar experience with my cockatiels. Tinky came into our lives as a reward to my daughter for bringing up her grades in school. He was such a joy to have around, and was so well socialized to everyone in the family that we would sometimes argue over who got play with him. We eventually decided to get another, not intending so much for him to be company for Tinky, as there was no short supply of that for this dear bird, but it would give us another cockatiel to love and dote upon. As it was, Tinky had a daily itinerary that divided his out of cage time among the different family members.

When we brought DeeDee home, (also a male, but our young daughter was assigned to naming him and couldn’t be talked out of this one), he was kept in a separate cage but in the same room as Tinky (this was some time before quarantine was recognized as a necessity it avian husbandry). The two immediately took to each other and spent much time clinging to the cage sides and calling to each other. Eventually, they were housed together.

Not too long after the two birds were sharing a cage, we began to notice some changes in Tinky in terms of his willingness to interact with the family. DeeDee was impatient with our attempts to bring him around to being a family bird. This was a disheartening period for us. 

After all, our intentions were to have two birds to love and share life with and now it seemed we had none.  Somehow, we needed to keep Tinky interactive, and persuade DeeDee to be interactive, while still allowing them each others company. We discussed a strategy, and settled on one.  Back to the itinerary.

What we did was not complicated, but it was effective. We decided, for the time being, to put the birds back into separate cages but this time keeping them in separate rooms. We divided up their out of cage time amongst the family members, as before, but this time the schedule gave Tinky time with each of us, the same allotment for DeeDee, and time for the two birds together with each of us.

The alone time spent with Tinky helped to re-establish and maintain our bonds with him. The time spent with DeeDee was helpful in trust building with this new family member. They had their special time together, in our presence, which gave DeeDee the opportunity to watch Tinky interact with his human family. This served to show DeeDee that humans are safe and trusted by Tinky, and that we can be tons of fun. Sometimes we come bearing delicious treats.

Once we felt confident that we had completed our mission, the two birds were once again caged together. Tinky has remained loyal to his humans, bur while DeeDee bonded to a degree with our daughter, he did not with my husband or myself.  He is friendly but still aloof , definitely preferring Tinky’s company over ours. This is fine with me.  He is polite and cooperative when the situation calls for such behavior, so I try not to have hurt feelings over his choice for companionship.

We were mistaken in our thinking that a second cockatiel would mirror the behavior of our first. And we were unprepared as to how adding a second bird to the home might change the sense of loyalty in the Tinky’s heart. With a little gentle guidance from the human flock members, it all turned out well in the end.

Patty Jourgensen specializes in avian health, behavior and nutrition and has been working with and caring for rescue birds since 1987.

29 comments

paul new stewart

i have a 10 year old sun conure..he sleeps undewr the covers since he 6months old..he loves it there at night..he has 2 cages in the living room..one is big the other he turned into his hideout,cozy and all.thats where he takes his day naps..i’m gone somewhat and i always wanted to get him a friend..another conure..does it matter if its M OR F..but i never want to lose the friedship i have with rusty..it would kill me..he takes showers with me and at times is so cuddly..i love it..so what should i do to keep his same character in place yet give him a friend for company..or would he try to kill it?he is spoiled rotten but thats why we get them..lol..i’d hate to lose the connection we have..would it bfor him to have company or not…? thank you

paul new stewart
Rachelle Scott

We had the same situation with our cockatiels, it’s hard to find a balance, but it is important to always try to divide your time equally. They share a cage but have alot of freedom at night time when they fly around :)

Rachelle Scott
Christine Dickey

I bought a sun conure for Christmas. There were two at the store and the second one seemed to be really having a hard time separating from her cage mate, so I bought “her” also. They were thrilled to be back together, but they both want to bond with me and are fighting over who gets “the shoulder” and who gets the “royal perch”. Then they fight and I get bit in the process. I am thinking about separating them into their own cages and in different rooms during the day and letting them stay together at night. I tried separating them once before and they started screaming back and forth to each other, so I gave up on that idea. I think it is necessary however and in the long run should work out. Any more suggestions?

Christine Dickey
Patty

Hi Michelle, Definitely keep these birds apart. Quakers are famous for not playing nicely with smaller birds. You have already experienced a problem between the two and my guess is that it is just a matter of time before there is an outright attack on the budgie. Patty

Patty

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