The honesty in this post gives me comfort. Lifelong is an understatement, it is multigenerational. I grew up with my grandparents Amazon, Baby. I now have the painful and heartbreaking task of letting Baby go. He is 50 years old with lots of life still to live. When my grandfather died, my mom and dad took him in, that was 15 years ago. And before my husband and I married, hubby made it clear Baby wasn’t going to be left with us. He knew how long well-loved parrots live. My mom’s sudden passing in 2021 left my 80yr old disabled father doing his best to care for him. I’m agonizing over letting Baby go but I know (at least I think) it’s the right thing to do.

I’m not in a position where many people ask me the question, but I’ve started to think it is appropriate to say, “Why not adopt an intellectually disabled child rather than a parrot – there are plenty who need a good home?” Literally. It is something people do, and find very rewarding. If you can make that sort of commitment to a living creature, and put up with that sort of level of mess, destruction, and noise, why not do it for a child who’s disadvantaged and is unlikely to have a particularly good life otherwise? There are, of course, plenty of completely valid reasons for taking on a parrot rather than a child! But if you really can give a parrot the sort of attention and commitment it needs with good will for its entire life, then you might well also be able to make the incredible difference between an institution and a good home for a human child. And it would have the added satisfaction that a family home is a more natural environment for a child, rather than the dreadfully artificial one it is for a parrot! (I do keep birds, but I wouldn’t dream of attempting to keep the larger parrots – the noise alone would defeat me, and the cleaning is bad enough with my little birdies. Do you have to throw your food all over the floor? Really? I mean, seriously?! But if you usually live up tall grass stems and in trees and bushes, what does it matter what you throw about?! LOL. I was greatly amused, I have to say, by seeing the little ones poking their vents over the edge of their nest to poo: I didn’t think they had any cleanliness instinct at all before that). It’s also really not fair to allow things like noise or destruction to fall on other people who haven’t chosen it, like neighbours or roommates. I say this particularly feelingly as someone who has migraine with persistent aura and whose life is made a misery by dogs and radios. What you may be able to just tune out, may be making someone else ill. And the reason it has been (in the UK) so difficult to get rented property that allows pets, is that landlords get so fed up with pursuing tenants for the cost of the damage, and with the whole pain of putting it right before they can relet even if they do manage to reclaim the cost from the tenant. Something I would like (and have nowhere near enough experience to compile) is a good list of suggested easier substitutes, for people who are attracted to the typically impractical large parrots for reasons other than having a very committed desire to care for something and a real fascination with them. Then it isn’t just cold water on a cherished plan, but a suggestion as to how they might rework it into a more-likely-to-be-successful plan. Enjoying your blog! :-)

This is so tragic yet so very, very true. I hope everyone who ever considers getting a parrot has a chance to read this. They require so much more than a normal pet. In reality, they should probably require a special permit to have them as pets. It would be better for every parrot out there in the end!

This is an important thing to think about. My husband and I got a 1 1/2 year old macaw in th mid 1990s. We read lots of books about parrot behavior and caring for birds, etc, and visited several local breeders before deciding on him. We believe in a lifetime committment to our macaw. It has been a challenge, though, as it is so true that he will never move out on his own. He also seemed to decide, a couple of years ago, that he liked my husband instead of me. I bought your recent course and am working on this now. We have made provisions for his care in our wills. We also strongly caution anyone we come across who is interested in getting a parrot that parrots require a lot of care and attention and ask them if they are ready to take on 30-40-50 years of taking care of a bird.

Dumb as hell Peta Driven!! Parrot are very rewarding pets. The end justifies the means for these people don’t buy in to the haters B.S.

Does the bird really need to bathe 2-3 times a week. That seems kind of rediculas.

I think it’s good to understand the reality that living with a parrot is a lifetime commitment. However, I got Ben when I was graduating from college, and I couldn’t imagine my life without him. I think young people can take on the responsibilities of parrots if they understand everything that is involved. I made a promise to Ben that I would care for him for the rest of our lives together, and with that mindset, I make sure that his needs are met. Parrots are a lifetime commitment, and anyone looking to add a parrot to their home needs to be prepared for that journey.

I cannot add anyhting to Bill Taylors comment which is completely y apt as was the article.Should be mandatory reading for prospetcive owners.

Think of having a baby, Then think about that baby being a special needs baby. Then realize that having a bird requires even more attention. There are few if any schools/ institutions to place your special needs child into, when needed. There are few friends that will be able to properly care for your bird while you are away(vacation, hospital, out of town death) and most likely one or both,the bird and birdsitter could end up bloody and traumatized. Just remember that you cant just send this child (your bird) out to the back yard by itself to play. Or banish it to its Room (cage) when you are tired or its bad. That is with a normal Bird. What happens if your Bird ends up being a special needs BIRD? A serious commitment is not enough to describe the depth of needed commitment.

So true. I have a 25+ year old Amazon whose family “outgrew” it. I have a 20+ year old African Grey whose person got married. The person’s new wife brought young children, dogs, and cats, and insisted the Grey must go. I have a 10+ year old U2 who was passed from store to store to store every 6 months in attempts to sell it. Normally I would never “buy” a pet, but this U2 needed stability. I have a 10+ year old Pionus that was the last of his clutch and unwanted. Finally, I have an 20+ year old African Senegal whose person “just didn’t have time for him anymore.” People have a hard time committing to a dog or cat for a their lifetimes (10 -20 years depending on breed). Most people have no clue what it means to commit to a lifetime of a parrot.

I got a second job and saved up lots of money to bring home my goffins cockatoo, Boo, when I turned 20. The breeder sold him to me, unweaned, and I lucked out on taking him to the local zoo vet and getting him to eat a base diet of pellets (in 2000, when that was all still new info). He has been through EVERYTHING with me that I have experienced as an adult. I have been limited on places that I can live, because of him. I have not dated certain guys who didn’t like birds, because of him. I’ve not had certain people to my apartment, because of him. I’ve had to be extra careful with roommates, because of him. I probably didn’t party as much in college, because of Boo. I have never gotten my deposit back on an apartment, because of the chewed up doors and moulding. Because of those crazy early 20s: Boo has breathed pot smoke (thanks to a roommate I left him alone with), Boo has drank beer (thanks to using the bathroom without him at a party I held), and Boo has had way too much pizza and ramen noodles than is probably good for him. He’s lived in NY, CA, and traveled across the country with me. I’ve had to either move his large cages with me, or buy new ones. It’s a moving expense and inconvenience that you don’t think about! There have been weeks and months when I skipped eating out or buying things for myself, because Boo had a vet appointment or because I had to buy food or toys. When I left an abusive guy, I left him with Boo and what I could fit in a duffel bag. Boo witnessed all the physical and emotional abuse. I let Boo choose my next boyfriend, and we met because of a Facebook post I made about him. Boo moved in a few months before I did, and we’ve all been together over 5 years now. Boo has been amazingly resilient and forgiving, despite life changes that I could not have predicted when I got him. I cannot imagine being closer to any other non-human being. Prioritize health. The reality of having a cockatoo or parrot in your early 20s or teens, is that you will go through LOTS of life changes. Connect with avian veterinarians, prioritize your bird’s health and healthcare. Birds don’t care if you make their toys out of cereal boxes and pine cones, or if you buy the $25+ commercially made ones. Healthcare, wing trims, appropriate pellet base and a good diet, are vital to helping your bird survive your 20s with you. Boo and I celebrate our 15 year anniversary together in May. I can’t wait to throw a big bird party :-)

Patti, you are so right on about all of this, and as a bird lover and keeper myself, I cannot thank you enough for sharing such wisdom. I found your site while looking for aviary ideas and DIY ideas to where I can build an outdoor sanctuary for my own family of cockatiels that I have had since they came into this world right from the egg 15 years ago. During a recent transition, I have dreadfully discovered that I am severely sensitive to my own cockatiel’s dander and dust after spending several hours with them in the same room. Mind me, I have made a ‘transition’, as in moving across the states to a much smaller place w/low ceilings, little ventilation, and literally no air to breath nor room to escape to in my new home. The worse thought that could ever cross my mind would be that I would have to part with my family of 4 cockatiels. You can only imagine how deeply painful that is for me to have to think about as I type this. I’m at a complete loss at the moment as to what my solution will be that would help to get my breathing back on track. As of late, I have been left with episodes of asthmatic attacks, wheezing, coughing, endless sneezing, and recent specs of blood in my cough after being around them for several hours. When it comes to the quality of my own health and life, there’s no doubt about what steps need to be taken. However, it is a painful realization without a doubt. I think, as yourself, I would never ever recommend someone to have a parrot or any kind of bird in their home not only because of all of the reasons you mentioned already, but because of long term respiratory and health related issues as well that sometimes, and oftentimes go unnoticed until years later. In my case, my family of cockatiels had their own rooms, sufficient ventilations, daily sprits of water, baths and habitual cage cleaning. All of that was neglected during the last 3 months while I was finishing up my education and my transition. However, even if it was not neglected, this does not eliminate the underlying health issue and reaction to the dander and dust from the birds. Truly devastating! Thank you for sharing your wisdom!

Amen! May whatever powers that be bless you. Please encourage people to start small and less long lived? If they love and enjoy a Cockatiel or Green Cheek, Maybe move to a somewhat longer lived bird? The larger and more charismatic big parrots are simply going to outlive most owners, and are exponentially more difficult to live with and care for through the many unexpected changes life brings most of us. Even a private home in many neighborhoods isn’t going to work with a Cockatoo or Macaw, or a noisy Amazon. Or the all time most rehomed on craigslist quickly, Sun/Jenday Conures! Finding a home with a dog is difficult enough for renters. With Parrots?? Average age US parrots are first ‘rehomed’ is 3 to 5 years. Just about when they become fully adult and ‘hormonal’. The sexual imprinting of birds on humans by hand feeding (All but universal among pet store/commercial parrot breeders) kicks in and the bird sexually bonds with someone in the house. Occasionally the opposite gender of the previous ‘caregiver’. Devastating to the caregiver, at best inconvenient for the new ‘mate’. The issues of keeping a parrot multiply once the bird is ‘pair bonded’ to a human. Being left alone may become a panic situation as parrot ‘pair bonds’ very rarely leave each others side unless one is sitting on eggs while the other finds food. You leave to do the rest of your life besides the parrot, it screams so you can find your way home, (obviously lost or in trouble) nobody responds, or you go in and punish the parrot for the drama. Either of which increases the insecurity of the bird. This often spirals down till the relationship is permanently damaged and the parrot’s behavior is incompatible with living in the home. (ANY home!) Educated training and behavior rewards help greatly, but as social and intelligent a creature as a parrot simply isn’t suited to living the bulk of every day alone and socially isolated in small cages or enclosures while most of us work or lead the non-parrot parts of our lives. Parrots who never had a mother and constant love and attention during the formative weeks and months or early social nest training before fledging are deficient in adaptability and emotional resources or stability. Like most orphans. For the many birds who don’t make a ‘pleasant’ adjustment to living with humans it expects to nest with but who Won’t, and can’t, the parrot is ‘rehomed’, to another even worse experience, finally living in a cage somewhere in social isolation. A so called ‘sanctuary’ that does the minimum to qualify for non-profit status but just warehouses the birds. (Not knocking the few excellent refuges. Far too few!) For birds that live as long as humans, this is a LONG time to be inconvenient. And alone. For as social a creature as a parrot, a life only humans could be cruel enough to impose. The social imprinting on humans that hand feeding creates also means many ‘companion’ parrots can’t learn to live with other birds, even same species ones. “Oh, look. What a pretty bird!! Let’s get one!” And another bird starts on a life only the darkest of story tellers can do justice. Parrots aren’t fashion accessories or interior decorations, to be changed out when no longer ‘fresh’. “You are responsible, forever, for what you tame.” The Fox, in The Little Prince, Antoine de Saint-Exupéry Parrots are the 3rd most owned pet in America. Easily the largest percentage of impulse pet purchases, despite their initial expense. And have the least available rescue and sanctuary slots of any common pet. Even fewer actually adequate rescue placements. And a vanishingly small amount of enriched living places.

I can relate to that. I am not exaggerating when I say that out of 100 people I know, only 1 could make a good pet parent. I swear. I have seen it so many times before. People buying or adopting an animal they have been dreaming of for years, and then choosing to get rid of him a few weeks later. I wish I was making this up. The nicest people suddenly realize a kitten is too much work, a parrot is too noisy and a dog exhibits behavioral issues (caused by neglect, of course!). So mainly whenever someone decides to bring a pet home, in 99% of the cases I can feel it is not going to work, and start discouraging them by explaining that it’s too much work, that it’s a commitment for life and I bring up topics like vacations, behavioral issues, bigger cages, nutrition… And guess what? No one ever listens to me. They buy the animal, and change their minds a few months later, after which they say “you were right. Take it. I don’t want it anymore” Some even threatened of throwing the animal on the streets if I wouldn’t take it. No laws protect animals where I live… It’s tiring and frustrating to try protecting innocent souls from ending up with irresponsible owners. When it gets too hard, I extra-spoil my own pets to forget most aren’t lucky to be wanted and loved. Mother of 3 rescued cats, 2 rescued african greys and one dog

I bought my parrot when I was 16 years old. I am now 28 married with 2 kids. He was with me every step of the way. He moved with me where I went till where I am now. Love him to bits. Looking forward to many more years with him.

10 years ago, my husband and I promised our Moluccan Cockatoo Bilbo, that we were his forever home. He was 9 years old when he came home to us. Despite the bites (more frequent earlier, less so now) and damage to property (3 laptops killed, oak staircase spindles chewed, one wardrobe destroyed, a side drawer unit being destroyed etc), we would never, ever part with him. He’s noisy and destructive, loves throwing food around, has a little emperor complex but is loving, adorable and our boy. I have to spend many hours making little jackets for him to protect his chest from him – he will try to damage himself. It is stressful and takes up valuable time. But I will continue to do it even if I can’t sew anything else (I make reproduction historic costumes for myself in my hobby as a re-enactor). Since Bilbo came home to us, he is viewed as the most precious inhabitant of our house. Nothing else is as precious. We are lucky that we have my parents and my sister who are all parrot lovers and owned by parrots – so we have somewhere we know will look after our Bilbo when we do want to go away. We have an excellent vet 10 minutes drive from home who has TWO Avian specialists running the surgery. They care for Bilbo so much. We have bumped into one of the vets in our local supermarket and he always asks about Bilbo. The entire vet team loves our boy. They have said and have provided accommodation for Bilbo free of charge when we have desperately needed it. Even when we do go away on holiday and know that Bilbo is safe and loved, we never have a moment when either of us don’t think about Bilbo or mimic his cheery “hello’s” to each other in the absence of them. However if anyone asked me about getting their own parrot, I would try to persuade them not to. I just think there are few people who understand that any pet should be a lifetime committment (their lifetime). After all, when people have children and times get hard or its stressful with those children – they don’t “find a new home” for them. Why do the same thing to a pet – regardless of whether its a parrot or a cat or a dog. Children will (in most cases) grow up and become independent. Raising a disabled child is probably closer to owning a pet – you are their only caregiver. The person they trust (pet or disabled child). Neither will become independent. They are with you for life.